A Nice Memory

I couldn't decide if I wanted to post this to our blog or my blog so I decided both.

I remember the first Christmas season Jason and I shared together. We put up the Christmas tree together and shared many nights sitting on the couch, sipping hot coco, talking about stuff. I miss those nights around this time. They would have to be one of the best memories so far as a married couple...at least to me.

Haha!!

NINE WORDS WOMEN USE

(1) FINE: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) FIVE MINUTES: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) NOTHING: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) GO AHEAD: This is a dare, not permission.

Don't Do It!

(5) LOUD SIGH: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and won ders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.

(6) THATS OKAY: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) THANKS: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) WHATEVER: Is a woman's way of saying F-- YOU!

(9) DONT WORRY ABOUT IT, I GOT IT: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking
"What's wrong?" For the woman's response refer to # 3.

My Thoughts

Every night before I head to bed I think of updating the blogs and what to talk about. Some nights I have the answer while others I don't. Other nights I will head to bed, be laying there and then think of something that I want to get out. So I get up and write it down with full intentions of putting it on my blog the next day. Most of the time, if not all every single time, I don't put it on my blog.

I think I am going to head to bed, hopefully get some rest.

Lonely

Tonight and for the last couple of days, I have been feeling really lonely. Jason has been kind of busy but still around. Throughout our whole marriage, whenever we get really busy we take a break and just have our time. Whether we go on a little vacation to see family or just spend the weekend at home alone without having my brothers or sisters over. Lately though, we really haven't done that. And tonight he's working late. I know there are times when he has to work late. I am not sad about that. I just think my emotions have had enough. It really has to just be my emotions. Little things like if he doesn't kiss me goodbye or I spend time cleaning some of the house and don't get to the kitchen and then he says that the kitchen looks like crap...but I just worked my butt off on the rest of the house. Yeah! I am venting about marriage. What more can I do? I don't want to really talk about it with another human being because all I would do is bawl. Heck, I am crying right now.

I just want to relax with my husband without any phone calls and just talk, just be together.

My Hidden Struggle

I don't think many people know about my struggle to be accepted and at the most, talked about for who I am, but not just for my age. My age became the topic of debate when Jason and I started dating. I felt like no one was seeing the real me, because the real me was more than a number. The real me wanted them to ask about my past, present, and what I want for my future. Instead I was shut out of the conversation. Instead it was my age, the number I began to hate. Crying became a ritual, I felt so overwhelmed with emotion. Finally, we decided to go for it, just get married. Then people couldn't say anything. Well, after deciding that, 2 weeks later we got married. Regardless of what other people thought or said. You know what? After we got married all the discussion about my age faded away. Still to this day I just don't get why they just all of a sudden stopped.

I do know that I am actually happy in my life. I found the love of my life, the one I was meant to be with and could not ask for more. We saw something in each other that no one else saw at the time. I still don't think they completely get it. I say "whatever" because they will never know what we have, cause they will never have it. I get to spend the rest of my life with the most wonderful guy. I love you Jason!

hehe...1 year married in a month!!

My Wedding Day

The best day of my life was my wedding day. When I woke up that morning I couldn't help it, I was excited. It was the day that I would say, "I do." Not only was it the best day of my life, but a starting of a new life. A life to be shared with someone right beside me.

Getting ready was so chaotic. I remember while my mom was doing my hair, at the same time I was doing my little sisters hair. It was still so unreal. It still had not hit me that I was getting ready for my own wedding. I soon forgot all about the chaotic running around, when I was ready. Then it was off to the church.

Arriving at the church, knowing everyone was inside waiting for me, was just so unreal. I could not believe I was going to be married in less than a half an hour. I went into the bathroom, got on my dress, and slipped into my shoes. I looked in the mirror, unready for what was staring back at me. I was in a gorgeous wedding dress about to marry the one I love. I will never forget that moment that I looked into the mirror.

Leaving the bathroom to walk down the hall where everyone await my arrival was like watching a movie. It was like I wasn't there but I was really. It was all real, just amazing. Walking into that room was so nerve racking. I didn't know what to expect. The ceremony was the longest thing ever. Maybe that is just because it was my ceremony, but eventually it came to the most important part. We finally both said "I do." Then what I had been so nervous about all day was done. I was married now.

So, through all the stressful, unreal, and movie-like times, I did get married. I have been married for 1 year. I am truly in love and getting married has really changed my life for the better. I hope other people can experience what I experience everyday. My wedding day has and always will be the best day of my life.